Bride Excludes Ex-Bridesmaid From Bridal Party Events After She Steps Down From the Role, Ex-Bridesmaid Is Sour: ‘[She thinks] I’m being vindictive’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Dec 27, 2024 9:00 PM EST

When you become a bridesmaid, you accept every task that comes with the role. Since it's not your wedding, you kind of have to deal with the attire your bride bestie chooses. After all, it's one day of thousands in your lifetime—being there for your best friend on her special day is what matters the most. It's one thing if the dress doesn't fit you, but simply disliking the style and proceeding to step down as a bridesmaid because of the dress is teetering along the line of nonsense.

The bride in the story you're about to read explains that one of her bridesmaids disliked her dress, which influenced her to step down from the role altogether. The bride was completely fine with having one less bridesmaid because she didn't want to force someone to wear something they outspokenly disliked. But, when you get booted from the bridal party, you're probably booted from bridal party events, too. This sour ex-bridesmaid wanted all the perks without the dress. Scroll to read.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    I (29f) am getting married soon and I recently had one of my bridesmaids decide to step down from the wedding as she didn't like the dresses I had asked them to wear. This was fine, we had a polite discussion about it and it's a voluntary position so it wasn't like I was
    via Joeyy Lee for Unsplash

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for not including an ex- bridesmaid in wedding events?
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 03
    I (29f) am getting married soon and I recently had one of my bridesmaids decide to step down from the wedding as she didn't like the dresses I had asked them to wear. This
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 04
    was fine, we had a polite discussion about it and it's a voluntary position so it wasn't like I was going to try to force her to stay in the party if she really didn't want to wear the dress.
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 05
    The problem is that because she's not in the party anymore, I've removed her from the bridesmaid groupchat, she won't be invited to the bachelorette dinner (we
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 06
    hadn't started planning this when she dropped so she isn't out any money or PTO taken or anything), and she also won't be going to the rehearsal dinner, getting ready with
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 07
    the bridesmaids the day of, or sitting at the head table. To me this made perfect sense - all this stuff is for the wedding party, or in some cases for family and
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 08
    out-of-town guests (she is neither). Her perspective is that she was invited to all of this before and she should still be as a good friend of mine for many
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 09
    years, and that by excluding her after she decided to step down I'm being vindictive. AITA? EDIT: Many people are commenting that their/their
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 10
    spouse's/friend's bachelorette trip wasn't just the bridal party and so I should invite this friend/other friends. I acknowledge other regions/social groups may
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 11
    do this differently, but I have been a bridesmaid multiple times and I have never been to a bachelorette with more people than just the bridal party, so I had not planned
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 12
    to invite anyone else. I will not be changing it now because A) I have a large bridal party. All my close friends save this one are already coming. B) I have no idea where I would stop
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 13
    inviting people if I started moving lines around to include anyone else. I can only imagine I would either hurt feelings or be adding an extra 15 people and no
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 14
    offense, but it would be me and not anyone commenting dealing with the logistics and expenses of that.
    via s*tanswafflemaker
  • 15
    Malibu_Cola • 21h ago • NTA. She stepped down, she doesn't get to participate in the wedding party activities. She's suffering from a bad case of main character syndrome. She stepped down because she doesn't like the dresses, and then expects to be a part of the wedding party activities.
    via Malibu_Cola
  • 16
    Mountain-Pear-... 21h ago NTA, part of being a bridesmaid is wearing whatever dress you're told to without complaint. She doesn't want to be a bridesmaid she doesn't get to do all the fun bridesmaid related things.
    via Mountain-Pear-1682
  • 17
    • Clean_Factor9673 19h ago NTA. Stepping down means attending as a guest; guests don't buy the dress, come to dress appointments, attend Bach, get ready with the bridesmaids, be in pictures other than general reception shots (not posed ones) or sit at the head table. At this point just disinvite her if invitations have been sent.
    via Clean_Factor9673
  • 18
    . Watching Telly N... 18h ago By opting out of being a bridesmaid, she also opted out of bridesmaid activities. It's not rocket science.
    via WatchingTellyNow
  • 19
    hannahkelli • 19h ago NTA. You're not excluding her from anything - she opted out. Of course, it's not surprising that someone who steps down from being a bridesmaid because she doesn't like the dress thinks the natural consequences of
    via hannahkelli
  • 20
    that choice are you being vindictive. Anyway, this isn't even a question. She chose not to be in the wedding party, so now she's not in the wedding party. Simple as that.
    via hannahkelli
  • 21
    Zestyclose_Bis... • 17h ago NTA she decided a dress was more important than being there for a friend
    via Zestyclose_Bison_499
  • 22
    Garden_Lady2 · 21h ago. Have a wonderful wedding and a great future. NTA, she's being so unreasonable it isn't funny! She's the one who pulled out of the party for a strictly narcissistic reason, or so it appears. anyway. So she doesn't like how the dress looks on her,
    via Garden_Lady2
  • 23
    Cheezburger Image 10440834048
    via Garden_Lady2

Tags

Wedding Themes bride marriage entitlement wedding party drama wedding planning wedding drama bridesmaids marriage-drama wedding bridesmaid brides entitled planning weddings entitled people
Scroll Down For The Next Article